My wife has watched me go on and off the Atkins diet for years, and recently I convinced her to try it. I know that it works, and it does something I thought to be impossible without some form of drug: Atkins shows you it is possible to get rid of food cravings in a natural way. Growing up a fat kid, this continues to be a unique and enjoyable experience. But, unfortunately, I have come to the realization that I equate Happiness with the well known sensations of a carb high.
So, while I'm on Atkins, weekends are the wonderland I dream of touching with my hands. My smile creeps out from its hiding place and my hands get reacquainted with sensations they haven't felt for days such as grabbing a knife and slowly cutting through the soft sides of a wonderfully smooth and firm bagel. Moments later, my eyebrows rise and my nose picks out the delicious smell of warming/burning bread, as my mind imagines slathering the golden brown toasted "skin" of the bagel with an unhealthy layer of cream cheese... Ah, the simple pleasures of the life of a carb addict.
And then, every Sunday, I consider giving up carbs for another five days, and I wonder, what is happiness without carbs?
No, I'm not saying that I don't experience happiness. I love my life. My wife is great. She is smart. She makes me smile and laugh and I can't imagine the next forty years without her. She grew up poor and has an appreciation of family and friends that has nothing to do with the pursuit of things. She is beautiful, and she has thankfully delivered three healthy, funny, happy kids. We are the type of people that make other couples sick. We win at Pictionary. Most of the time we are "in sync". Of course, everything isn't perfect. Parenting is tough. Bills suck. Being fat brings sadness.
However, that isn't the point. I'm talking about the day to day happiness that goes missing when the carb addiction subsides. No more highs. Eating is perfunctory. And where eating used to be something we could depend on between the work, and the parenting, and the other responsibilities of life, on Atkins, it just becomes another responsibility.
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